Every atheist needs a cozy go-to hoodie to curl up in, so go for one that's soft, smooth, and cheesy. It's the perfect choice for cooler evenings if you're not in hell yet!
• 50% godless cotton, 50% atheist polyester
• Double-lined hood to hide from JWs
• Double-needle stitching throughout
• Air-jet spun yarn with a soft feel and reduced pilling
• 1x1 athletic rib knit cuffs and waistband with spandex
• Front pouch pocket
This praise cheeses unisex hoodie is perfect for the cheese-loving atheist that you are. We wear praise cheeses hoodies because cheese is better than gods. How, you ask? 1. Cheese is real. Unlike a god or Jesus, cheese can be detected and proven to exist beyond any doubt. 2. Cheese tastes better. I dunno if you've ever had those communion wafers during the eucharist, but let me tell you, Jesus' body ain't got nothin' on the glorious umami bomb that is any cheese. 3. Cheese smells way better. I've never smelled Jesus but I can promise you that there is no cheese on earth that smells worse than a zombie who died 2000 years ago. 4. Cheese is always there for you. You don't have to go far to find cheese these days, but try to find a god. I dare you.
Atheists, I don't think I have to convince you how much better cheese is than gods especially when melted over a rotisserie baby. Honestly, you could take cheese to communion and make those damned wafers finally have a flavour. Every day, I am thankful for cheese and all that its given me: belly fat, gas, debt, deep satisfaction and a lust for life. So, atheists, if we're going to praise anything, let it be cheeses. No gods required.
P.s. if you grab yourself this hoodie, I'd love to see you in it. Tag me on Instagram in your gorgeous selfie, you beautiful atheist: @godless_mom