Category Archives: Jeebots

An Open Letter To The Atheist-Hating Jeebot Who Says We’re Stealing Christmas

The Atheists Who Stole Christmas

Dearest Chuck O’Neal, I read your letter to atheists, agnostics and other unbelieving Christmas celebrants. You know, the one in which you “sincerely” wished us all a Merry Christmas and then proceeded to threaten us with images of Hell? Yeah. That was about as sincere as Milli Vanilli at karaoke night. Thanks bigly. You said,

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Pet Peeve: I Am So Tired Of Being Spoken To Like This By Theists

Condescending theists

I can’t stand condescending adults. You know the sort… the ones who talk to you like you’re five years old even though you might even be older than them? It’s that tone, that waitress tone, “How’s everything tasting, here?” said like she’s operating a feathered puppet to coax a toddler into answering her. That grating tone

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10 Reasons I Probably Couldn’t Be Friends With Jesus

Why I can't be friends with Jesus

Yesterday morning I got this note in my inbox: Hello Godless, I saw you speak of your non-profit work on Instagram. I just thought I would write to you to tell you that you’re the sort of person Jesus would want to befriend. If you open your heart and accept Him, He’ll be the best

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The Case For Replacing Jesus With Jason Momoa

Jason Momoa's abs

Alright hetero boys, if you are at all uncomfortable with your sexuality, now’s the time to check out because Mama’s gonna praise the gods of rock hard man abs in just a few.  Consider this your trigger warning. Recently, on Instagram, I posted this meme: Stop worshipping Cesare. #atheist #atheism #atheistrollcall #atheistpics #pray #faith #religion #godless

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Why I’m Breaking Up With Catholics

Catholics

I knew this day was coming… I felt it creeping up on me slowly as I perused the PriestArrested subreddit. I could sense it looming just over the horizon as I watched Spotlight and read reports on various abuse scandal inquiries around the world. I could smell the day getting closer, I could almost touch

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Another Catholic Thinks She Knows Why You’re An Atheist – Is She Right?

Catholic church

So there’s this Catholic rag… Aleteia they call it. If I gave a fuck, I’d look up what that means, but predictably, I don’t. Y’all know how I feel about the Catholic Church and defenders of it, so let’s not fake nice, here. Aleteia is a child rape apology periodical and once I took down one of

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7 Alternative Explanations For The Empty Tomb of Jeeby

The empty tomb of Jesus

Honestly heathens, you’re not really trying if you haven’t had someone ask, “Oh yeah? How do you explain the empty tomb, then?”. I thought we could tackle this question today. How can we explain the empty tomb of Jesus? For this exercise, we have to grant a few things. They are: Jesus existed. Jesus was

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7 Words Theists Misuse Constantly

Me and my friend

I have this friend. She’s a good fifteen years younger than me, and we lived pretty close to each other when I was in vancouver. That was almost 4 years ago, so she was in her early twenties at the time. I remember one year, as her birthday approached, she kept bubbling on about wanting to go

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What Would You Do If Christianity Were Proven True?

Fuck god

So, I was asked the other day what I would do if Christianity were suddenly proven true and there was no denying Jesus is the son of god any longer. While I clawed my way through the rest of the email, dotted with familiar phrases like “typical atheist” and “denying the evidence all around you” and

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Holy F*cking Comments: Candy & Boobs!

Candy

I haven’t done a comment round up in a long time, y’assholes, and I always enjoyed it. So, I thought I’d deliver to you some of the best, most guffaw-worthy abominations of the English language I’ve had posted to my content lately, so you and I can crack a beer, pop some corn and watch the

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